facing the shadow!
- 1 minthere was a time when i thought being a good person meant always showing up for others—helping, giving, never asking for much in return. i still believe in kindness, but somewhere along the way, i started feeling… incomplete.
i couldn’t quite place it. maybe it was those moments when friends drifted away without explanation, leaving me wondering if i had done something wrong. maybe it was the quiet nights when the weight of self-blame felt heavier than it should. or the times i looked in the mirror and thought, why do i feel like i’m not enough, even when i’m doing everything right?
that’s when i came across carl jung’s idea of shadow work—the understanding that we all have a hidden side, the parts of ourselves we push away. the insecurities, the anger, the sadness. we bury them because we think they’re weaknesses.
i realized i had been doing exactly that. every time i felt hurt, or alone, or frustrated, i brushed it aside. i thought being “strong” meant not feeling those things. but they didn’t go away. they just became part of this shadow i was pretending not to see.
facing it hasn’t been easy. sitting with those uncomfortable parts—admitting that i feel lonely sometimes, that i question my worth, that i wish things had turned out differently with some people—it’s messy. but it’s also real.
i’m starting to understand that accepting my shadow doesn’t take away my kindness or my strength. it makes them more honest. i’m not just the person who’s always there for others; i’m also someone who needs to be there for myself.
and maybe, that’s what being whole really means.